let it pour

Have you ever sneezed into a fan and had your sneeze spit blown back into your face? Yeah, that's probably the best way to describe how my day's been going so far. I'm seriously starting to act my age in the sense that I just canNOT accept myself for who I am. I feel like a failure constantly so imagine what happens when I actually mess up. All I want to do for days after is bash my head onto solid concrete a billion times.

Other than me hating myself x1000 everything is dandy. I have the coolest person in the world as a boyfriend (I think), work is fine, and Logan is doing great. He's getting bigger and bigger every day! I think it's thanks to Logan that my family life is slowly improving. At least I think. I'm trying to put more effort into it as well. The school search is on. I'm looking at college websites right now. I hope to have figured out where I'm going and what I'm doing before the end of the week. It's not gonna happen. Hahah.

I smelled that.

A small blog today. I'm essentially posting this to tell all of ypu that I've been busy running errands, kitten caring, applying to college, reading, shaving, eating, swimming, cleaning, driving, working, boy drama-ing, and getting into shape.

On a side note, I ripped a pair of pants yesterday trying to "stretch them out." Thunder thighs for the win.

"where all these girls did their goofy, sexy poses"

I had a relatively rough day at work. The entire computer system shut itself off within the second hour of my shift. This happening made my manager feel as if she had the right to verbally and physically manhandle me for the rest of my shift.

Not much else to say, but here, check this out. I lol'd.

Twisted Pleasure

The court appointment is on Monday at 1:30. The Planned Parenthood (for birth control) appointment is on Wednesday at 9:45. I know I don't have work on Monday, and it doesn't matter either way, because I'd be off by one regardless. Wednesday has got me a little worried because I'm not 100% sure if I have work or not.


Short attention span. Bbl.

repeat chorus (x42)

God damn, dude. My love handles haven't been this predominant since I was about thirteen. I haven't had a legitimate workout (other than sex) in weeks. My little formation of abs is practically gone and looking in the mirror is not a good thing for me to do, more so now than ever. My excuse is that I've been busy, but really I'm not. I'm only working fourteen hours this week, I have no homework, nor any other obligatory tasks to complete (for the most part). I did finally go for a jog around the block like I used to do last night. I was so elated when I came home it was sad. Other than my crippling self-esteem, work is going fine. I've found a method to keeping my left lip piercing open, but it's only a matter of time before my co-workers notice. Until then, I'm happy. I went to the luncheon for my scholarship today held by Kawannis at (something) Mia's in downtown San Jose. I still speak in front of crowds terribly. I have a facial twitch and it was goin' off like a motherfucker. I was so embarrassed, but more so disappointed in myself for not being able to accomplish the simple feat of talking to a crowd of fifty plus people. It's not that bad.

Look, a giraffe.

reminder

I work Monday 7 to 11.